Makennah

🌈 Infertility is heartbreaking — but being LGBTQ+ and navigating Canada’s broken system makes it even harder.

When we started this path over a year ago, I had no idea how long, emotional, and expensive it would be. 1 in 6 couples are diagnosed with unexplained infertility, and through working with incredible holistic practitioners, I’ve learned there’s always a reason — it just often goes unseen in traditional care.

When we began, we spent $11,000 purchasing sperm from a U.S. sperm bank — because Canadian legislation makes it virtually impossible to have Canadian sperm donors. The irony isn’t lost on me.

We went through four rounds of IUI, spending over $5,000 on procedures alone, only to find out that the sperm we purchased had low counts and poor motility — and they kept getting worse. Despite “quality guarantees,” the sperm bank wouldn’t stand behind it. With no real legislation in place, we had no recourse.

Fertility treatments became a full-time job: medications, supplements, daily appointments, endless hope.

Then, something beautiful happened — a close friend offered the most incredible gift: to be our known donor. But in Canada the system makes that almost impossible. Using a known donor means thousands of dollars in genetic testing, psychological assessments, and frozen sperm quarantines. You even have to apply to the Health Board for the possibility of being allowed to use it — and fly to Toronto just to complete the process.

Meanwhile, straight couples can walk into a clinic with someone they met yesterday and be granted care without question.  We shouldn’t be denied care and the ability to create a baby with someone we know, love, and trust — someone who will be part of our child’s life, someone our child can know and have an incredible relationship with. Our child deserves to know where they come from — and to have the amazing gift of an uncle who loves them too. 🤍

Because the process for known donors is so difficult, we have been doing at-home inseminatons using a kit. So far, we’ve had five failed attempts — but we’re still holding onto hope that it will happen. 💛

As soon as we chose to try with our friend, we were dropped by the clinic we had been working with — no more medications, no more monitoring.

Thankfully, we found an amazing holistic fertility group who has helped us rebuild hope and prepare my body for the journey ahead. We’re currently taking a two-month break to heal and re-calibrate.

Since last year, the cost of fertility treatments has increased by 34% in some areas — and Alberta remains the only province without any public funding for fertility care. An IVF cycle with medications can now cost up to $30,000 — and many people need up to three IVF treatments to see success.

Even more frustrating? In Canada, clinics are not required to publicly post their success rates. Choosing a clinic often feels like blind faith — trusting with your heart and your life savings, without any real transparency.

Fertility treatments should not be a privilege only available to those who can afford it.