Blog
Excerpt from the memoir “How to Get a Girl Pregnant”
Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. Can I fill up the day with 16 separate tasks so that I don’t think about waiting?
Just Adopt
There’s really no escaping it. When you’re facing infertility, other people getting into your business begins to feel pretty routine.
Four things I’ve learned about having a baby in my 40s
As many of us that have struggled to get pregnant know, life doesn’t always go the way you expect it to.
Surrogacy: How did I find myself here?
I was fourteen the first time a doctor told me I may never have children. The words felt like a punch to the gut.
How infertility changed me
The deep desire to have a baby and all that comes with being unable to conceive naturally, once took over my entire life.
The memories that will never be
How do you miss something that never was? Since a young age, I have hoped and dreamed and planned and believed that certain things in my life would happen.
Embryo evaluation, part 3: Blastocyst stage embryos
To grade blastocysts we look at three things — the expansion (or how big it is), the quality of the inner cell mass (ICM), and the quality of the trophectoderm.
Hear us
I’m volunteering for Fertility Matters and trying to make meaning out of something so painful. By talking about it, I’m giving back to those who feel unseen and unheard.
Self-care during infertility
Anyone who has experienced infertility knows the toll it can take, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Self-care is often overlooked but important.
Embryo evaluation, part 2: Cleavage stage embryos
To grade a cleavage stage embryo there's 3 things you can look at — cell number, fragmentation, and symmetry.
How to advocate for yourself at your fertility appointments
Appointments at fertility clinics can be overwhelming. So how do you advocate for yourself in your fertility appointments? Here are a few ways.
Smiling depression
The worst kind of pain is when you’re smiling just to stop the tears from falling. Hiding behind a smile can prevent those around you from being able to help.
Embryo development and evaluation, part 1
An important part of being an embryologist is evaluating what an embryo looks like, because embryos that “look better” have a better chance of working.
Just when you think you’ve moved on…
Here I am, two years post-fertility treatments, three unsuccessful IVF rounds under my belt, and nothing tangible to show.
Who am I now?
Finding out I couldn’t have children was one of the worst experiences of my life, not just because of the content of the message, but the delivery as well.
Yoga to support your mind, body, and spirit, pre- and post-IVF transfer
You may be asking, “Is it ok to practice yoga poses right before and after an IVF Transfer?” Here are some suggestions.
Mosaic embryos
If you have done PGT-A/PGS, then you have probably heard the term mosaic embryo. What exactly are mosaic embryos?
Four things not to say to your friend struggling with secondary infertility… and one thing you should
My five-year-old son is one of those children who is always running around, climbing on things. I’ve heard every euphemism in the book — spirited, busy, active.
Finding and holding on to glimmers and flashes of hope during infertility
It can be especially difficult when you’ve been battling infertility for what feels like ages, and everyone around you seems to be getting baby after baby.
5 goals for a happier 2021 while TTC
When 2020 began, I was consumed with my need to have another child, which was compounded by my New Year’s Day miscarriage. I was feeling defeated.
An overview of PGS/PGT-A testing
PGS testing is a technique that lets us take a closer look at what’s happening inside the cells of an embryo, to see how many chromosomes are in there.
I am happy for you… I swear!
I’m not great at staying in touch daily, weekly, or even monthly with people, but I am always around to pick up the phone if someone calls.
Why a chemical pregnancy or early miscarriage is still a loss, and why you need to mourn it
“A loss is still a loss, and you need to mourn.” is what my doctor said to me when I burst into tears in her office.
At what point did you leave joy on the clinic floor?
Deflated, we sat in Sandy’s the psychologist’s office sulking, hating the fact that we were even there. It was a harrowing year of infertility.
Radical self-love during infertility
Do you know what I really want for Christmas? I mean, besides the obvious. I’d really like to love myself more completely.
Secondary infertility - “What are you waiting for?”
Anyone suffering from infertility knows the dreaded questions. I experience a lot more of the secondary fertility questions, like “When are you going to have more kids?”
Dear fertility patient in the waiting room
I’ve sat in that chair you’re sitting in with the same nervous but hopeful look. I feel the emotions you’re feeling, and I hear the thoughts that you’re thinking.
What it’s like to be an embryologist
In a word, hard. When I started in embryology I took the common path. And by that I mean there was no path and I kind of just fell into it.
Opening our hearts to foster care
Little did we know that a decision we made on an impromptu weekend getaway in May 2019 would bring so much love, heartache, joy, sadness, and fulfillment.
Shining a light on miscarriage taboo
Tonight is the International Wave of Light where the world pauses to acknowledge all those babies who have been lost through miscarriage, still birth, and in infancy.
I’m so sorry
I found out about our first miscarriage during a big meeting at work. As a 28-year-old aspiring career gal, I was in “make a good impression” mode.
Pregnancy after loss isn’t all rainbows
It took a long time to be able to sit down and write this. For the last three years, I have shared my journey on social media, the good, the bad, and in between.
Male factor: up to 50% of a couple’s fertility problem
Male factor, an aspect related to the male partner, can contribute to a couple’s fertility problem in up to 50% of cases.
Are you there, universe? It’s me, an infertile woman
Infertility is all about biology — eggs fertilizing, embryos dividing, and blastocysts implanting. We mortals can do nothing to ensure that actually happens.
To my friend who just lost her baby
Dear friend, I have racked my brain trying to figure out how to ease your immeasurable pain. So I will give you this letter.
Moving forward and letting go
Four months ago, my husband and I made the decision to stop fertility treatments and move forward with our one and only child as a family of three.
Light through the darkness: Infertility and pregnancy loss
Infertility and miscarriage are cruel. You can spend years trying to get pregnant, seeking invasive treatments, and then in the blink of an eye, it’s all over.
The infertility worrier: You can overcome
As a child, I grew accustomed to feeling ill when my worrying waged a war within my brain, and then, my body.
Getting back to fertility treatments after a summer off
The air is changing. We wake up one morning and just like that, the summer’s gone. I can practically feel my biological clock tick, tick, tick.
The first day of school
When my son started JK, we were in the throes of fertility treatments, and it was just another milestone that reminded us we hadn’t yet given him a sibling.
The infertility worrier: You are not alone
It felt like a 20-pound weight was resting on my chest, preventing me from doing anything, especially rest.
When it’s over
Those reading this blog are looking for inspiration, hope, insight, and compassion. I am not sure I can offer any of those things at this juncture in my life.
Taking back my stolen identity
When someone has had their ID physically or electronically stolen, there is often a feeling of being deeply violated.
When there’s something in everyone’s water but yours: Surviving workplace pregnancies
I love babies! I could talk about babies and my dreams of pregnancy and becoming a mom for hours.
Piece by piece
At my fertility clinic, they put out large jigsaw puzzles in the waiting room. Once one is complete, they replace it with another.
Joy beyond the bundle
Having lived in Winnipeg 24 years, my whole adult life, one would think I’d have made peace with winter by now, but one would be wrong.
Conversations with my husband
My husband and I tried for seven years to have babies. We fulfilled our dream six years ago, but spent the past five years trying to give our child a sibling.
The perfect patient
When I started fertility treatments in an attempt to give my son a sibling, I was the “perfect patient”. I trusted the professionals to guide me through the process.
The importance of infertility advocacy
I recently came to the realization that although we are talking about infertility more than ever, it is still not enough.