From the moment you start trying to conceive, there are so many unknowns; how long will it take? Will I get pregnant? CAN I get pregnant? When you’re then dealing with an infertility diagnosis, those questions multiply. But I do think, whether you are trying to get pregnant, have conceived or are currently pregnant, the questions and the what ifs never end. I think actually getting pregnant is just the beginning; the beginning of a journey of complete unknowns. At face value, you may see your friends happily posting weekly updates on bumps and pictures of nursery’s or the latest and greatest registry finds and you wish so badly you were at that stage.
But in all reality you may not know what they’ve gone through to get there.
Right now I have quite a few friends who are at various stages of trying to conceive, who are pregnant or have just given birth. One of my friends is about 32 weeks along right now in what has been an already high risk pregnancy. About 29 weeks in she had quite a scare. She had symptoms that were not consistent with her pregnancy and immediately googled those symptoms. Shortly after what she discovered, she was admitted to the hospital. It turned out she had low level ICP, a rare liver condition you develop while pregnant and usually around the 28 week mark. Luckily she is being monitored appropriately and she and her little Jellybean are doing just fine.
She and I talk almost daily.
I have vented all of my struggles with trying to conceive and she equally opens up to me about the difficulties of her pregnancy. Neither one is easier than the other. The conclusion we recently came to? Sometimes getting pregnant is hard, sometimes staying pregnant is hard, sometimes getting through pregnancy is hard, and sometimes delivering is hard. As women at any stage of our fertility, we need to support one another.
I could have never imagined the path I would be on right now but I am continuously fortunate to be surrounded by such a strong tribe of women who, I feel, truly support one another.